i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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