and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Someone signed my nipple.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
