It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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