o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
