I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Randomize
