also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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