I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
This house was built for laser tag.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
