Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
