what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Randomize
