Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Ladies don't puke and tell
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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