I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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