we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize