that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
