Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize