Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
