btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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