youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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