why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
