my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
