you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Randomize
