Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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