They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
