Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
