How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
