I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
