Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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