i would punch a child for taco bell
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize