I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize