Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
