doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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