I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
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