just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
