Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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