I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
