i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize