Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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