2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize