Sponge bath it is.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
