brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
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