She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
