We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
