No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize