He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
