This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I won't apologize to a one balled man
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize