i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
