What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
