I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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