hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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