And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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