Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
