she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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